Walk Worthy

I was extremely distracted.
Felt guilty because I didn't want to be there.

Last Sunday morning in church, right on the front row, I thought of absolutely 100 things except what Bro. David was preaching about.

It wasn't his sermon on Ephesians 4 or his style that had my mind wandering, it was that:

1. Abby was due home after 2 weeks of summer camp.
2. Abby and I had not done hardly any communicating during those two weeks (very unusual)
3. The past two times I had spoken with her, she had been in tears.
4. Jae's memorial softball tournament was happening 20 miles away without me. I needed to be there. It's rude to have 100 volunteers working at the event and me not be there.
5. We had a guest music director (which was why I felt I couldn't miss church). Extremely nice man, but unfamiliar music directors are stressful on lil 'ole piano players like me.

All of the above combined made for a "restless listen".

Then,...yesterday,....I began to remember the scripture passage of his sermon.

Walk worthy of our calling.
Walk worthy.

The verses beg us to "walk worthy of the high calling which we have received."

To "walk" means we are going somewhere.
It's intentional and directional.
It's active.

I've been given a gift of a very high calling. God Himself has called me to live (walk) for Him and do the things He wishes me to do.
I'm a servant of the King.

He has lovingly called my name.
I need to remember to walk each moment in a way that brings Him pleasure.

Walk.

Worthy.

I've thought of that phrase almost every hour for two days.

The written word of God is a living thing which can re-enter my mind hours after I tuned it out.
Thanks to Bro. David for the passage.

Thanks to my Lord and Savior for loving me in spite of my messy self.

Prayer

A few years ago, some friends and I decided the youth group we were leading needed more prayer. (of course).
We were intentional.
We were passionate.
We were regular.
We were stunned......

You see, within weeks of the prayers, our small group of teens began
to grow
and grow
and grow!

I am ashamed to tell you this, but the biggest surprise was that God answered our prayers.
No kidding,...we were bustin out all over with teens who were lost. Our "church kids" were frustrated that this new group of unrulys had taken over "their" group.
We 4 adult leaders (volunteers) were excited but completely taken off guard as evidenced by our ridiculous lack of resources to deal with 60+ students.

We moved the adults out of the sanctuary, put the kids in there on Wednesday nite and had a blast with great praise, worship, devotionals, door prizes and skits.
It didn't take long, however, for us to get overwhelmed at the church vandalism, smoking in the bathrooms, sex on the church bus and utter disrespect for all adults.

Sounds like a nightmare huh?
and I tell ya what,...It felt like it at times.
But we were so sure that we were experiencing a movement of God.
Now, I'm not so sure.

Here are some observations of that moment in time:

1. Today, as far as I can tell, very few of those unchurched kids are followers of God. I don't see that we had much of an impact on them at all. I imagine that the only devotional they will ever recall is the one I did which involved a Happy Meal in a blender. And it wasn't God that made it memorable, it was that two people threw up in the class room.

2. Some churches aren't ready to reach the lost. Bayou Meto is ready now, but we sure weren't then. Lack of leadership, bad attitudes, lack of volunteers and lack of discipleship crippled us. How eternally unfortunate for those kids.

3. Legalism will never work with teenagers. They will rebel every single time.
And I say Good for them! Adults will plod along in a miserable religion, but most teens won't put up with it. They can spot a phony miles away.

4. If I'm going to pray like that, I better prepare for bigger results than I can imagine. Mine and my friends puny prayers were clearly heard in Heaven. I still marvel that we were surprised.

5. It made me long for more corporate prayer in our churches. Our prayers lists are important. Truly they are. I have asked to be on the list and am relieved to find my needs and requests on that little piece of paper in the hands of my church family.
But few of the prayer needs listed on our church prayer list are there for Kingdom purpose. Should those not be there in abundance?

I started the year 2011 as a year for prayer.
and once again,...God is amazing me.

I'm sure He is rolling His eyes at my wonder.

New Way To Tithe

Hey Bro David and Bro Ernie,....
Remember the other day when we were talking about changing up the order of our worship service a little bit?

What do you think about inviting our church members to come down and give their offering like this?

Churches and Bars

I have communicated recently with a dear friend who is hurting.
His life is hard.
Painful and full of fear for the future.
I know how that feels and you probably do as well.

My wonderful Aunt Eve was an alcoholic for a great deal of her life. Living alone in Dallas, she found a tremendous support system in the Alcoholics Anonymous Association. That great organization assisted her to remain sober for about 25 years before her death on Christmas eve of 2000.
She believed that her 25 years of sobriety was one of her greatest accomplishments.

Her way of following God did not resemble my path to Him.
Aunt Eve would never be described as a "church lady".
When she visited us here in Arkansas, she came to our church and was loved and welcomed, but I always get the feeling that she really didn't approve of our church.
I don't think she felt as if she fit in.
She was always eager to go home and get back to her "club" in the smoky Dallas AA meeting room. It was her church and she was a faithful attender every week.

Aunt Eve asked one day;
"Do you know the difference between your church and the local bar?"
Well now.
I (we) could think of several differences!
Differences like,....Cigarette smoke? Drunks? Poor lighting? Hookers? Sin?
Ya know,..important things that lots of us "church people" have strong opinions about.

"Do you know the difference between your church and the local bar?"
I will never forget her answer......
She said "The people at the bar will tell you the truth when you ask how they are doing."

Is that not the truth?
Is that not the truth.

Our culture values our privacy and independence, however, I think we could use a little more transparency. We go to church every Sunday and sit next to people who seem to have their life all in order.
That's discouraging for those of us who don't.

This Sunday, when people ask me "How ya doin?" ....I think I'll just blurt it out and tell them I'm a crazy mess.
Who knows,..I just may cheer someone up!

Hand-Holders

I am a nurse.
Things looked a little sketchy in college, but I always knew I'd be one.
It's a calling on my life just as sure as some people are preachers and missionaries.

I work with all kinds of nurses and by far, most of them are exceptional.
Some are funny, some are creative, some are serious, some work all day in high gear and some are quiet and slow. They go into the presence of their patients with one thing on their mind, and that is to offer some sort of comfort or help. The help could range anywhere from flipping a pillow underneath a head to injecting a high dose of Morphine.

I know a few bad nurses.
Their skills are fine, may be even excellent,.... but they are a sorry excuse for a nurse.
Know why?
Because they don't care about people who hurt.
A nurse who is rude, unsympathetic and thoughtless will cause instant outrage.

Ronald Reagan was shot in the 1080's and wrote a book about his experiences after the gunshot nearly ended his life.
In his book, did he give accolades to the dynamic surgeon who dug a bullet out of his chest?
Did he compliment the radiologist who pinpointed the location?
Did Mr. President write about the ER doc who stabilized him until surgery?
Nope.
None of those brilliant people were the ones who calmed the President of the USA and made him feel safe.

The most important man in the world made a hero that day of the nurse who held his hand and would not let it go.
She squeezed his fingers from the time he entered the Emergency room until he went under anesthesia an hour or so later.
Now, I guarantee you that the nurse had a lot more skills which may have been more useful at that moment than being a good "hand-holder", but the President didn't think so.
He was desperate for some heartfelt care.

I think our churches today are like that.
People come to us with heart and soul-threatening wounds and we want to get in the middle of their business and "fix" things.
They are in the right place!
By cracky, we have the answers!
Quick!
Right away!!
Save em!
Baptize 'em!
Sign them up for a committee and convince them it's the same thing as "ministry"!
Make 'em come to church twice on Sundays and once on Wednesdays!
Then, after a few weeks, those people in pain will walk out of our sanctuaries wondering why they don't "feel better".

Come to think of it,..
I think a lot of our members are there as well.
I can think of lots of friends who have left a body of believers because they were not "cared for". I'm ashamed to say, but I can recall that I often chalked it up to the notion that those people were "too sensitive".
Not any more.
Now I know that some people enter our churches looking for good hand-holders.
That important life-saving skill, my friends, can point them straight to Jesus.

Caution!:!:
SLOW Learner here!
This isn't rocket-science Becky.

Teaching

Last night, I went to Red Lobster with my friend Kay. The hostess took us to a booth waaaayyyy in the back of the restaurant where a ginormous group of teens were eating together (the Paragould boys and girls high school soccer team).
I observed other Red Lobster patrons be escorted in, look around and immediately refuse the seating arrangement. I, on the other hand, felt right at home.
Tomorrow morning is the first of three Sunday mornings that I get to teach our youth group. (yippee!) Since Levi has come on our church staff as part-time youth director, I have not gotten to teach much, and boy have I missed it!

Good ole Southern Baptists.....here we are in the start of the new Sunday school quarter. Where in the cotton-pickin-heck are the new books?
I have no idea.
You'd think since I live with the Sunday School director, I could find out this important information.

So.
I get to make a lesson from scratch.
As usual, I teach from the spot where God is working in my life. Not always the best lesson plan, but today it's working for me.

Years ago, Ralph led our family in some scripture memorization and the first one he had us all learn was

Psalms 1:1-2

Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,

nor stands in the path of sinners,

nor sits in the seat of the scornful;

But his delight is in the law of the Lord

and in His law he meditates day and night.

I love that verse and it's going onto my mirror this afternoon.

It will remind me to not let myself get spiritually lazy.

We do not smoke, drink, cuss, have sex outside of marriage.

We go to church and tithe.

Therefore, God must be pleased.

C'mon. We know better than that.

We know better!

We know that in order to be a delight to God, we must pursue His heart with our own.

It's not enough to stay faithful in our religious routines.

Some of the people farthest away from God will be sitting in America's church pews on Sunday morning.

It's dangerous to raise our families with our frantic busy schedules and allow no time for the matters that God considers important.

Although our hopes are high, our spiritual expectations for ourselves and our children are often very low.

The small youth room at Bayou Meto won't be filled with deep theological wonders and discussions this Sunday morning.

But then again,......I think it will.....

EverThird

Fine cuisine at the "Fish and Pig" restaurant.

Above- EverThird prays before they perform

Below- Steve playing bass in the 35 mph wind gusts!

If I was a real camerawoman, I would pace the battery life of my camera.
I have about 50 photos of the waterballon slingshot contest.

but only the three photos above of Everthird.

Dang it.
*********************************************************************************

In our lives, we tend to want to see immediate results and answers to our prayers. Personally, I am not always good at the long-term praying thing. I pray for a while and then either forget, lose my passion or give up on my request.
And when I DO pray, I tend to have a good idea about how God should respond.
Oh I say that I want Him to surprise me, but do I really expect it?

The most memorable prayer that I have ever prayed was at the side of Jae's casket in the funeral home. It was early on Friday I think, and I drove to the funeral home and told the director that I wanted to be uninterrupted with her.
DeWayne personally closed the door behind me and sat in a chair on the other side to prevent anyone from entering.

Most of those last mother-daughter moments will never be shared, but I often speak publicly about my prayer there by her side. To be honest, I've written this very paragraph 50 times trying to describe those moments, but just can't find the words to convey the moment. Let me just say, that I cried out for God to bring good out of the bitter circumstances we now faced. I also begged to see the good now, here on Earth, and not have to wait until "all things are revealed" in eternity.

I am grateful that God has answered my prayer many times over.
Countless times in fact.
I will remain confused and disagreeable about God's plan for a short life for Jae, but at least He loves me enough to constantly attach good things to her name.
My mother's heart is grateful.

In my wildest dreams, I couldn't have imagined this weekend.
Here's a short summary of a long story:
It began with a heartfelt lesson in March 2004 in a tiny back room of our small church.
I created the lesson for Jae, Casey, Ralph and myself, but I taught it to about 8 teenagers, 2 of which were mine.
Less than 24 hours later one of them, Jae Lynn, is in Heaven.
Without realizing it, the theology of that lesson prepared me for the worst days of my life.
It kept me sane through the coming months.
It sustains me still.
3 years later, I wrote the experience into a post on this blog.
Months after that, I happened to click onto Youth Specialties blog on the very day where they asked for memorable moments of youth ministry.
Feeling sure they were looking for food-fight moments, I sent them my post anyway.
My friends at YS considered the moment relevant indeed.
They created it into a "video story".
It was used at three national conferences to encourage thousands of youth pastors and leaders across the nation.
One of those youth pastors, Shannon Lovelady from Georgia, looks for me and finds me in Nashville. He tells me he wants to bring his band (EverThird) to perform a free personal concert for my small group of teens.
Now it's Monday and I just spent the weekend with the members of EverThird ( Shannon, Mike, Andrew, Nick and Wesley) interact with the members from our church and especially our small youth group.
They gave a concert and played their hearts out to probably the coldest tiniest crowd they have ever played for. But I know it's because they really play for the Most High God and not anyone else.
When they pulled out of our parking lot, they left behind a small group of Southern Baptist teens, parents and church members who are worn out, encouraged and inspired to want more from God.
Then the band sends a text message to me saying they are grateful for what our church did for them!

Jae Lynn,.....honey.
I wish you were here to see all of this.
I'm so grateful that I still get to speak your name and I feel incredibly blessed when I see how God puts Himself into all your influences.
I look so forward to seeing Him face to face like you do, but until then I will rest in the knowledge that He has remembered my cry.
I love you more than ever and will be there in the morning.

New Battles, Old Tactics

I have always wondered why soldiers in the old days walked out into battle, shoulder to shoulder in a line heading straight toward their enemy, knowing they would be shot.

"HOLD!!"
“DO NOT BREAK THE LINE!” their commanders would shout at them!

In fact, those that went against common sense and “broke the line” were branded as cowards and weak. Didn’t they know they were supposed to stand up and fight like a man?
When I see it portrayed in movies, or I read about it,..I always shake my head in disbelief.
The tactic makes no sense.
Walk out into the line of enemy fire without protection and “hope“ nothing happens?
Why train? Why drill?
I’m no soldier, but it looks to me like a senseless slaughter is the only thing that could happen.
What a waste.

Many old timey photos are of an aftermath of battles fought that way. When we gaze on those dead bodies, do we consider that those young men were someone's beloved sons?
Someone's husband?
Their daddy?

War is often fought for noble purposes, and it is an fair assumption that the commanding leaders will make intelligent decisions about the safety of those under their care.
Surely there was a time when the commanders of the old fashioned armies thought:
This is not the best way to win the war.
I certainly would imagine that the soldiers sat around their campfires at night quietly doubting themselves:
"Surely, we can be better soldiers and a more effective army if we did things differently."

The price was too high to do things the way they have always been done, especially when so many are paying such a high price.
What took them so long to figure it out?

Is that what we do today as Christians? We go to church on Sundays and other days we read our prepackaged, preprinted morning devotionals and step out our front door and face the world.
We are sitting ducks.
We are falling by the hundreds and wondering why.

We march through our lives thoughtlessly, being careful to “not break the rules".

We line ourselves up in the world, doing church as we have done for the past 100 years, directly in front of the enemy,..with zero cover.

We are fighting new battles with old tactics.
Wishing things were different, but not knowing exactly how to turn the war around.

Meanwhile, the enemy has all Christ-followers in his cross hairs.
At times, he seems to have outwitted us.
It's a bad time to be foolish.

As God’s beloved children, we all are in such incredible danger.
He is aimed at our heads, our hearts, our homes and our children.

Ephesians 6:12- (The Message)
This is no afternoon athletic contest the we'll walk away from in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the devil and all his angels.
Be prepared! You are up against far more than you can handle on your own.

Dear Lord,...
Help us all to listen for Your commandments and directions.
Your voice only.
Only Yours.

No More Boring Conferences!

Conference.

The very word sounds boring.

"I went to a conference" (yawn)

"Let's go to a conference soon" (ZZzzzzzz)

Sometimes we can just know when a conference is going to be waste.

I can often tell by the name of the conference, whether it is something I want to go to.

Maybe the speaker looks dull or maybe even the topic sounds like a snoozer.

There are certain groups/organizations who are intent on keeping their conferences dull. Maybe that's not on their planning agenda,..but it happens anyway. Time after time after time.

The next year, they get the same old planning committee together to talk about why no one attended.

Then they plan another dull one.

Don't go.

Just don't go.

Go instead with the teenagers in your church to their conferences.

They are ALWAYS needing volunteers and "frins,...let me tell ya sompthin",...I promise,..you will not fall asleep at a youth conference!

Below are some photos I took at the recent LiveLove Conference in Memphis. It is hosted by StudentLife. I tried for days to upload the video I recorded but I don't have the "tech-y" gene. It's only given to a few people over 40 and I am not one.

Part of why I love going to these gatherings with the teenagers is that I am reminded that there are still so many young people who are willing to serve the Most High God. I assure you,..that when they are in charge of creating church culture,...their generation of the church will not resemble ours. How exciting!

Sometimes those teens are a real mess. They don't act right all the time. They are spiritually immature and often seem to love the culture more than they love God.

How'about that?
They are just like us adults.

Abby and Dillon.

There were computers in the hallways of Bellvue Baptist Church.

Imagine that.

IHOP at night.

(note the difference between the two adults in the front of the picture and the teens)

A homeless man followed Levi in.

The manager kicked the guy out and then tried to order Levi out as well.

(Poor Levi. He was lookin all homeless, I guess)

The bus ride home got long.

Slaves and Brothers

A long long time ago,. there was this rich man who was a strong Christian. He owned several slaves, which sounds terrible to us, but was a completely acceptable practice in this time period and in his culture. Since he was a Godly man, his slaves were treated as if they were part of the family.
They were still, however, slaves.
Property.

One of this man's most trusted slaves yearned for freedom.
This man valued his freedom more than his life so he began to plan an escape to another country. To finance the getaway, he stole something very valuable from his master and fled with haste to a nearby country.
He chose this country because there were people there who had shown him love in the past.
Back home, the Godly slave owner was furious about the stolen property but also hurt because of his slave's abandonment.

In the new country, the slave met up with his friends from the past who gave him food, shelter and then taught him the way of salvation.
The slave became a new follower of Christ.

The slave's name was Onesimus.
The friend who led him to Christ was the Apostle Paul.
The slave owner was Philemon.

This book of the Bible is on my study list list this month and I have enjoyed reading Philemon as a human story.

Paul interceded for the slave, asking Philemon to take Onesimus back, not as a slave, but as a brother. Paul wrote his friend back in Colossus,..."Dear Philemon,...Love this man and forgive him everything. I will repay for anything Onesimus owes you".

The short book stops without describing the details of the reunion between Onesimus and Philemon. But we really don't need them because we have the idea.

We are reminded that Jesus interceded for us in the same way that Paul did for Onesimus.
He paid our debt in full.
We are also reminded that even though we meet others daily who are different in our professions, finances and appearances. we are all in two classifications:
We are either slaves,..or freed slaves.

Lukewarm

Here is some irony:
God does not need us, yet loves us deeply.
We are in desperate need of God, but fail to fully love Him.

Jesus constantly called out the Pharisees and other religious leaders for not being authentic.
He said to all who listened: If you follow me, be prepared to walk away from everything you love. (Luke 9:57--).
That was a hard teaching for those people to hear.
It's still hard.

Francis Chan was a speaker at the Nashville Youth Workers Convention that I attended last November. You know, there are some speakers who are powerful because of their communication style, and then there are some who are powerful because of their anointed message.
Francis is the latter.
His keynote sermon about becoming a true follower of Jesus had me covered flat up with conviction!

This morning I was reading his book called Crazy Love.
(sigh)
Convicted again.

Here's some of what Francis says in the chapter entitled "profile of the lukewarm":

***A lukewarm follower attends church. After all, it is an expectation.
***A lukewarm follower gives money to the church. A tenth. Sometimes.
***Lukewarm followers are moved by stories of people who do radical things for Christ, yet they do not act. They assume such action is for "extreme" Christians, not the average ones.
***They share their faith easily at Church, but rarely with neighbors, coworkers or friends.
***Lukewarm people say they love Jesus and He is, indeed, a part of their lives. Key word here,..a part. There are other sections where His "control" just wouldn't fit.
***Lukewarm followers are truly thankful for their comforts and luxuries.
***Lukewarm followers do not live by Faith, their lives are structured so they never have to.
***Lukewarm people don't really want to be saved from ALL their sin; they want to be saved from the penalty of their sin.
***Lukewarm people think about life on Earth more than they do about eternity in Heaven. Their schedule and "to-do" list is consuming.

The above list is just a small taste of what Francis had in his book, but I love how he fills the pages with scripture. It makes his written thoughts credible.
I'm telling ya,..this isn't a book to relax by,..it's a book to grow by.
(Sometimes I wish I could just pick up a good romance novel or something!)

Lukewarm Christians are the kind that Jesus would "spew out of His mouth".
That's the kind of harsh tone and rhetoric he reserved for the church leaders of the day.

I'm a church leader.
Most of you are too.

My prayer is that I lead by example.
Overwhelming? yep.
Possible? absolutely.
Today?

Luke 9:62 (The Message)
Jesus said: No procrastination. No backward looks. You can't put off God's Kingdom until tomorrow. Seize the day!"

A Real Prayer Meeting

I have spent the past three days in Duck Hill, Mississippi. Home of my God-fearing in-laws Bobby and Leona Russell. I count myself blessed indeed to be their daughter-in-law. They have taught me much.
Unfortunately, lightning hit their home a couple of weeks ago and the resulting fire left their home in ruins. The charred upstairs, the water damage from the fire hoses and the stench of lingering smoke has turned the happy humble home into an unimaginable mess.
It was sad indeed to see an entire lifetime picked through and eventually thrown into garbage bags. As I worked side by side with Leona in the mess,.... she was a living demonstration in peace and good nature. I've tried to imagine how I would be in similar circumstances. My "possessions" are very dear to me. In fact,..I have a list of things I would grab in case a quick evacuation was necessary.
Most have to do with Jae.
My tangible links to her.

On Wednesday evening,..we went to the Grenada Church of the Nazarene where the Russell's have invested most of their serving adult years. The tiny membership is deeply saddened because of the fire. For the pain my in-laws are enduring,....but for their church as well. That body of believers knows that Bobby and Leona will now move to Arkansas.

Wednesday night prayer meeting.....
I don't know about you, but my church has that scheduled every Wednesday night according to our bulletin, however,... last time I went, I don't recall spending a great deal of time in prayer.
I have had to miss it lately because of work or responsibilities in the Youth department.

Wednesday night "prayer meeting" at the Grenada Church of the Nazarene does the real deal. The few of us there this past Wednesday night gathered around the alter on our knees and prayed for a solid hour.
A solid hour!

One white-haired older man probably spent 5 full minutes on Praise and adoration of the God who saved him and loves him. In fact,...I think I now know how King David would have sounded if he had a deep Mississippi drawl.
Another pray-er was a handsome tattooed young man who had just moments before, witnessed his second child be born into this world. His prayer was so heartfelt and touching that I raised me head to watch him speak to our God.
Bobby and Leona Russell's prayers never mentioned the hardship they are in the midst of.

The entire prayer time was one of the best sermons I've heard.
I am convicted.

Do

In my opinion, one of the most intimate passages in the entire Bible is the story of the last supper.

Matthew, Mark and Luke each devote less than half of a chapter to that one moment in time. John, however, screeches the entire Bible to a halt and takes us through the scene word by word,..moment by moment. His portrayal lasts for an amazing four entire chapters!

In John 13-16, Jesus emotions and deep affection for these men is evident. Jesus slows His World-sized ministry down to a slow crawl because He knows His chosen men, His beloved friends need comfort, reassurance and information.
The situation is urgent.
Tension surrounding Jesus ministry is at an all-time high.
Everyone is on edge.
Even Jesus.
Especially Jesus.

Jesus knows that these 12 men He has lived with for three years are mere hours away from being faced with the fight of their lives.
And He won't physically be with them.

There are one hundred things I love about this section of John, but this afternoon, I am thinking of His command in John 13:17 to "Do".

Like many of you reading this,..I am faced with many opportunities to "Do".
Do this. Do that. Here's a good cause. That's a noble endeavor.
Should I "do" this? or should I "do" that?

I am at a place where I, once again, must re-evaluate my priorities. There is simply no time to waste at "doing" good things, while the ones which matter for eternity go undone.

Just because something is important to us,..does that make it important? (no)
How do we get into places in our lives where we can't "do" anything? (I don't know)
Does loving our family and working in the church count as "Do"ing? (maybe-maybe no)


Here's the new "To-Do" list mapped out 'specially for me by Becky Russell:
1. Evaluate my life for ruts. They cause spiritual slumber and/or disaster.
2. Follow my passions and gifts.
3. Pray,..no,... Beg for discernment.
4. Read the Bible. For me,..that means study it with my commentary nearby.
5. Anticipate the outrageous. (i.e. Faith baby!)
6. Do.

Jesus was not known as a predictable rule-follower, yet His life was characterized by all of His "do"ing.

I wanna be like that.

Hebrews 12

I've been a bad girl.

I have had such a crazy busy schedule during the past month or two that I have barely cracked open my Bible for devotions.
Now I am a firm believer that if your devotions schedule gets messed up for one reason or another,... that God doesn't get too bent out of shape about it. God is interested in the relationship,..not what is listed in our DayTimer calenders.

However,....however,....personally when I have a spell of no quiet time,..I find myself thirsty for God and His words to me.
Of course.
I am back on track now.
Drinking again.

My patients at Cardiac Rehab are of all different religions and denominations, and some absolutely love to talk theology. One of my patients, Tom, has a vibrant active Faith and teaches a Sunday school class of older adults who, according to him, sleep through church and life in general.
In an attempt to being some life and excitement to himself and others, Tom often will take a passage of scripture, and make numerous attempts to get his class to discuss the meaning. Occasionally,.he creates a deliberate rebellion by saying or reading something outrageous.
(Actually,..it's God who says the outrageous things,...and Tom just reads them.)

Last week,..it was a Scripture passage in Hebrews that he found confusing.
The scripture passage in Hebrews 12:5-8 talks about God "scourging His children".

Tom came to exercise therapy Monday morning and asked me what I thought about God intentionally bringing pain into our lives to make us go the direction He wants us to go.

Anyone who knows me know that I struggle with this concept of theology myself.
My opinion about this is not always popular.
My opinion about this is not necessarily correct.
My opinion about this is apt to change every hour.

Anyway,..here's the point of this story.
As I was studying this passage of scripture for myself and Tom,..a received a phone call from a dear friend who is deeply burdened with unexpected and sudden catastrophic health issues for her parents. Hospital rooms, cancer diagnosis, strokes, diabetes and now,..the need to relocate them to Arkansas.

My encouraging word for her did not include the "scourging of His children" part of Hebrews 12.
Gracious no!
My words for her were of the passage a few verses down (verse 12) which I had only moments before studied. It tells us to "strengthen the hands which hang down and the knees which are feeble,..so we can stay on the straight path".
I was able to encourage my friend in Mississippi that troubles will come our way,..but as brothers and sisters, we are all on the road heading towards God. Our job is to encourage each other on the way, in the middle of our good times, OR our bad times.
In our lives,..we pass people every day who, like Jackie, have "hanging down hands" or "the feeble knees". We do not need to always search for the reason we are getting beat up in life.
We need to pull each other along until we all get to Heaven.

So,..theology will still be discussed. It is right and proper to do so. I crave it actually.

Tom will still be in his Sunday school this Sunday and will probably lob another controversial topic in the middle of the snoozers.
Go Tom!

But I bet Tom didn't know when he did it last Sunday morning, that he would create a ripple effect which would make me sit at my table Friday morning, at the exact same time that Jackie would call me from Mississippi needing a good word.
The true delight is that the same passage of Scripture can hold such a vast wealth of meanings.

I love it when God reminds me of things like this.
I could just read about it,..but instead He chooses to make it real by getting me all involved in the lesson.

"You Ain't Dead Yet" award

I recently attended a "Youth Specialties" training conference and received the "You Ain't Dead Yet" award. The "honor" was mine because of all the attendees there, no one has worked with teenagers longer than me.

"How long have you been a youth worker? the speaker asked me in front of the crowd.

My answer surprised even me as I told him,...... "Twenty-eight years".

28 years? What in the cotton-pickin heck am I doing in youth ministry after 28 years?
And unpaid at that!

Anyway,..at this conference, I was one of the few females there and I was the only one who was not sporting a goatee and band t-shirt.
Ok,...Ok,...a few females had no goatees, but they all were wearing band t-shirts.

It's true,..I ain't dead yet. However, I am thankful for a young man and his wife who have decided to throw in their lot with our Church and live life together along side of us.

Levi and Sarah Tucker are the answer to my prayers for Godly leadership for our young people. Not only are they passionate about bringing teenagers closer to our Father, but they are popular, handsome, beautiful and fun!
I knew Levi would be a great youth leader when he showed up on his very first visit to our church youth group. He went outside, scooped up some snow into a monster snowball, brought it into the church hallway and nailed one of the boys right up side the head.

In the church for Pete's sake!
Now that's cool!

What a privilege to work with teenagers.
I pray that in 28 years,..Levi is awarded the "I ain't dead yet" certificate.
But then again,.......maybe I'll put my walker aside and go up to claim it myself!

Friends in Low Places

Today I am feeling good.
In spite of a frantic day at work. My work is usually very "un-frantic", but today was an exception. For an important reason, but a boring one to blog about.

Feeling good anyway. Here's some reasons:

1. Our church just finished a wonderful revival with two excellent worship leaders: Mike Franklin and Toby Talley. Godly brothers and talented communicators. Lots of salvations and re dedications (mine!)
2. I am going on a Florida vacation in a couple of weeks. White sands. Seafood. Ocean sounds. Oh boy oh boy oh boy.
3. Abby sang a solo (accompanying herself on the guitar) in church last night and I was thrilled at her voice and her presentation. I am most thrilled with her soft heart.
4. My house is clean. (thanks Ralph!)
5. I have the week-end off starting now.

I recall a weekend last fall when my two brother's families and mine traveled to Fayetteville to watch the Hogs play football. Usually we stay the night, but for some reason, a few of us found ourselves driving back home in the wee hours of the morning. I was in the front seat with David, I think, and we were up on one of those big bridges which span the valley of Northwest Arkansas. There was a pause in our conversation and he quietly said
"The trees are beautiful"

The trees are beautiful?
At 1 o'clock in the morning?

"Yes. They are" I agreed.

Hours before, in the daylight and from a different direction, we had driven across that same bridge and admired the November foliage of the Ozark landscape.
Now, here we were, driving through an inky black night, but surrounded still by the same beauty of the mountains.

What had changed?

To say the beauty is still visible would not be true. We really tried, but could not see the trees. We knew they were there and we derived pleasure at being in Northwest Arkansas, but the night-time view did not bring us satisfaction. In spite of our attempts to see the spectacular fall colors which were "right there!", we simply could not.

I think that's where we all can finds ourselves in life.
I know full well the frustration of being surrounded by people who encourage you to
"Look up!"
"Cheer-up!"
"Straighten-up!"
"Toughen-up!"
But sometimes,..we just can not see the good. The beauty is enveloped in darkness.

For me,..and I try very hard to make this blog personal,...To me, it seems that there are times in our life where we are supposed to be in the dark. That's a controversial statement, I know, but it is indeed my opinion. I'm no theologian, but am expressing my puny perception of the life lessons of the beloved Bible characters as well as the ancestors and saints I admire.

What did I gain from my deepest darkest night-season of pain?
Profound things.
Sacred knowledge.
I treasure the things I now know, however, I loathe the circumstances of my new knowledge.

Are the lessons learned worth the pain? God may say "yes", and I confess I want desperately to agree with Him always, but I fear my answer would be an immediate "No!".

I have family, friends and patients who are deeply enshrouded in circumstances of darkness.
I have no idea why God allows such pain in the lives of His children.
I have asked Him why,....A bunch of times actually.
I am sorry and am thinking of you tonight.

A New Sister

There is a verse somewhere in the New Testament (feeling guilty about not knowing the address) about "being ready in season and out of season to give a good word" .
Tonight I was dog-tired and starved but found myself unexpectedly taking home a car load of teenagers after church tonight. This old woman had not been home in 15 hours and I was feeling it.
Abby was in the front seat with me and only one girl left in the backseat of my car. Her home was on the other side of Jacksonville.
Oh boy.
Three-Dog-Night blaring from the car speakers (I like those boys singing LOUD!)
C-130's buzzing overhead.
Then I hear this little voice pipe up from the back seat and mention
"I've been feeling like I need to come closer to God".

We pulled to car over at the closest safe area so I could look her in the eyes as I told her about Jesus and His incredible plan for us to be brought to God.
Do you know where her first prayer and her salvation occurred?
Directly under my tree with my special "wonderfully different limb" that I blogged/wrote about on Saturday, April the 5th.
Really.

The most profound eternal life and death issue that this beautiful young girl will ever face is instantly entrusted to Abby and I.

And Three-Dog-Night.

Bible Study and Banana Nut Bread

Mrs. Harris, this is the best banana nut bread

that I have ever placed in my mouth!

Someday, dear readers, I will take pictures that are clear.

I got the "blurry picture gene" from my mother.

(sorry mom)

Susan (my best friend from childhood) and her daughter Courtney.

Susan and I will never seperate,..we know way too much about each other!
I wish she had her new glasses on, 'cause her husband

said they make her look "hot".

Donna and Wanda

Molly and Lee

The Gaither's provided the music for us.
(Thank you Bill.)

Two spiritual giants sitting side by side.

(Neither of them would agree with that statement!)

Walking By Faith pictures

Mrs. Geneva and Donna



OK this young lady was NOT at the Bible study, but
she was so pretty I decided to add her to my pictures!

Sharon and Lee

Laura and Connie

Susan and Courtney

The "group work"

These are some pics taken at our bible study tonight. We missed those who were not there. I took more pictures and I swear as I downloaded them onto my computer, some of them went to,..Bolivia or somewhere! How does that happen?

Anyway,..each session ends with us all on our knees. Tonight, we intentionally left off the prayer requests about health concerns, work issues, travel safety and such. Instead, we focused on our "Heart and Soul" request and needs. It was the best part of the night, and we will spend more time there in our next sessions.

So many needs.

Deep needs.

Soul-loneliness.

The study this week tells us to stop "resisting" the thorns in our lives.

Embrace the pain and learn the lessons.

Great gifts come in hard packages.

Does God really place the thorns there? On purpose?

All of us tonight agreed that, sometimes,..yes.

Yes?

Yes.

Why then, do we always think that all pain in our life is to eradicated?

Proverbs 3 reminds me that I am to trust in Him and not try to figure it all out.

Good thing.

'Cause I can't.

Walking By Faith

I am privileged to be leading a Bible study entitled "Walking By Faith: Lessons Learned in the Dark. It is by Jennifer Rothschild who lost her sight at the age of 15. I love this lady even though I've never met her.

It was exciting to have approximately 20 of my sisters join me in this and I can't wait (do you hear me?,... I CAN'T WAIT!) to see what God will do with all of us as we attempt to go deeper in our Faith.

This blog for the next few weeks will reflect some of the things we will be studying and I have invited all of my "study-sisters" to join me here.
Maybe they just want to check-in and read. That's great!
But maybe,..hopefully,...some will comment here and share some of the daily insights that they are learning. Oh I hope so!

Faith.
Substance of things hoped for,..evidence of things unseen.

Anyone who has heard me talk recently has heard me talk about this very verse. after losing Jae Lynn, Faith became so very mysterious to me.
Couldn't grasp it.
Did I lose my Faith?
Did I ever have it in the first place?

Chapter 11 of Hebrews lists the "Faith hall of fame". I have read it a hundred times, but was reminded tonight of the internal agony that each one of those heroes went through.
Their stories all have an obvious good outcome now, but as those individual stories were being lived out, the Faithful heroes were in deep darkness.
Emotional trauma.
Mental confusion.
They were not feeling very intelligent, heroic or Faithful.

If that's how the Faithful Heroes felt,..then take heart!
There's hope for all of us!