I'm Resolute!

Here's my list.
The thing absolutely no one has been waiting for.

I am going to try to do each of these this year:
(ahem)

1. Perform one anonymous act of service each day.
Family, friend or stranger. Anyone is subject to my attention.
After all, service is the premise of WeepySeeds.

2. Do something each day week occassionally that scares me.
I've heard people say do something each day that is scary, but I just don't have that much time or energy.
I am also a weenie weenie weenie and don't really wish to be scared.
I've heard however,..that doing this makes life more fun.
Fun is good.

3. Be more spontaneous.
When the girls were small, we used to have "Yes days". Everything they asked me got a "yes!" answer. Those days ended up being pretty cool days for me too.

4. Real Estate.
Acquire more.
(Should I warn Ralph?)
(I suppose.)

5. Continue my Book-of-the-month-Bible-study.
I will be posting my monthly list in my sidebar on the left. Join me!

January study is Revelation. Here's how it works for me:

**Have a study Bible and/or a commentary.
**Begin by reading about the context and author. This is crucial to understanding the message!. Who is writing these words (for God of course) and why are they penning these words? Who is the book written for?
**Divide the book into days of the month. For instance,...Revelation has 22 chapters, therefore, I can do about a chapter a day during the month and have a couple of days to slough off. If there are 40 chapters, then I'd need to read/study two chapters on some days.
**Start at the beginning of the book and read it in order.
**Read the Bible chapter,..then read the commentary or notes about that chapter.
** This step is important,.....Write your notes and observations in the margins of your bible! I call it "preserving the learning". This will be a reminder of the things you have learned.

This entire system can take anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour. Just depends on how deep you want to go, or how much time you have.

6. Memorize two verses of scripture a month.
This is something that Beth Moore is loosely organizing within her siestas blog following.
Join me here too! (Thanks Beth James for encouraging me to do this!).

7. Continue to keep an eye out for people who are drowning in pain.
They are everywhere, but are often camouflaged with a smile and a wave of their hand that things are fine.
I'm gonna git all up IN their business!

8. Continue to enlarge Jae Lynn's memorial educational scholarship.
I am no good, no good I tell ya, at fund-raising.
Way out of my comfort zone.
Way.

9. And of course, continue this blog journal.
It's been amazingly good for me to journal my journey in this fashion. I've got a LOT of work to do on my other pages,....I'm working on them all. I just am not posting them for viewing until they are complete. (or at least almost complete)

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I expect #6 to be my life-changer.

I love you and am so glad to have you as a reader and follower.

Letter To 2008

Dear 2008,
You have just a few days of life left in you and I thought that before you go, I might pause and reflect on your impact on me. Time has a way of marching on with or without our permission, and I've been making an attempt to try to make the most of my days and hours and minutes. Well,.. I try.
Most of the time.
Some of the time.
I try.

The things that this year has brought into my life have not been as earth-shattering as other events I've experienced in other years. Death, divorce and disease has kept it's distance from those that I am most tightly bound to. Praise be to God.

In fact, if I had to characterize this year, it would be one of healing. For me anyway. As a nurse, I know that healthy healing occurs from the inside out. I know that the deepest wounds take longer to heal and will often leave a lifetime of pain, handicap, scars or a combination of all three. I suppose that's where I find myself.
Pain of Jae's absence will haunt me until I breathe may last breath here. Missing daddy is mixed with the joy of knowing he is healthy again.
Handicapped?
Am I? Yes. In my head. People just really can not fathom where my thoughts go. Sometimes I can't either.
Scarred?
Deeply.
Yet,...I am confident that I am healing.

My mother and father-in-laws home burned in August. The tragedy became a crisis of belief which created no real options other than for them to move here with us. In retrospect,. the story has God's redemption all over it. He gave beauty for ashes. Literally.
I love it when He does that.

My study of the Scripture took a new path this year. I should say, it took me to a new and unexpected level. Studying a book a month,...with just me, the Bible and my gargantuan brown Matthew Henry commentary has provided me with just the right mix of structure and flexibility.

Christmas.
This year was not as painful as it has been in the past. I think one reason was because we decided to include Jae Lynn in the gift exchange. Whoever drew her name would give something in her honor or memory. Whichever name we drew for her would receive something in her honor. Aundra made several newborn baby hats which will be given to Bethany Christian Services in Jae's memory. Aundra also bought some "chicks" from Heifer International. Jae Lynn would have chosen chicks over every other animal!
The gift which we gave in Jae's name was a scrapbook which attempted to describe Jae to Emma, her 2 yr old cousin. This scrapbook covered everything from Jae's music, to her quirky personality traits, her love of animals, to her toenail collection and ended with a message to Emma that Jae and her will one day meet "in person" in Heaven.
On that day, they will need no introductions.
The only thing I would change about all of this, is that next year, I will do something similar for daddy.

2008, your imprint on all inhabitants of this earth will live on for eternity.
Some moments were forgettable and I certainly made my share of those during this year.
And some moments were of eternal consequence.
I find myself wishing I'd made more.

So 2008,...I will not miss you. Instead, I will anticipate 2009 with the good feeling of starting over.
New Beginnings are biblical.
Fresh starts.
Blank pages.
New resolutions.
New mercies for me as well as every other person alive.
A New Year filled with choices for each moment.